IF you're the kind of mother who has a fit of nerves when your child asks to have a party it's a good idea to calm down and think what a party means to children. Biofeedback for Kids is a new way to help children learn to control they bodies, and thus, their minds. Biofeedback for kids is a type of neurofeedback that uses signals from the body. There is also no sense in deciding you're helpless to plan and run a good party for children, or being aggressive and exhausting your­self by deciding you will give a better party than your neighbors gave. Fun at a party for children ought to be simple to arrange. Children make their own fun given the space, the time and a very little equip­ment, and anything-a good report card, the first flower in the garden, a jar of strawberry jam as well as a holiday or birthday-is excuse or rea­son for a children's party. As a general rule, the most elaborate parties are the least fun for the children.

let them practice
We should want our children to have parties both to have fun and to begin to learn to be social human beings. For the youngest children this is a fairly primitive process: the host may hit his guests over the head with the heaviest of his birthday presents, or he may pay little attention to them. Well handled, he can begin to learn even here. If we continue to give our children opportunities to act in social situations we will have the pleasure of seeing them grow in knowledge and grace to be good hosts and hostesses. Let's go over a few of the basic elements which make a party for children good.

the child plans
The parties children plan (or at least help to plan) themselves are the best parties. Mother must stand ready to make suggestions, to offer tactful vetoes. If you feel that some of your child's ideas are impossible, offer your suggestions in such a way that he feels he's making the deci­sions, not in a superior tone of voice which emphasizes the fact that you are the final arbiter.

the child decorates
As you go forward with the plans you and your child have agreed upon, let him help in their execution at every possible turn. The dec­orations children make themselves, for instance, are far more acceptable to them than the fanciest objects you can buy in any store. They may look amateurish and unfinished to you, but remember that the guests are his contemporaries, not yours, and they see with eyes as critical and appreciative as his.

the child invites
One way adults are most successful in spoiling their children's parties is to force them to invite children they don't want. Sometimes, of course, the child wants to have more guests than you can cope with.